CHAPTER 2
Recipe for finding a love, that would be having a great hair day and we had our bath. Make sense?
Oh god! What am I going to wear? Am I going to have these problems until the day I die, not knowing what to wear everyday, to any places and to each event. Sometimes it is best not being invited. But that would be mean. Anyway, I am going to see him tonight, YES! Looking at my wardrobe, hmm, I need a bigger one. Hey, no offence! Treat it like as if I am going through some therapy. There are too many stuff in here, I can’t even find anything suitable. Obviously having a bigger wardrobe will solve my problem in the entire world. After retrying and rechanging almost everything I had, I decided to wear something casual. But of course, I need to check with him, who knows if he is bringing me to some place romantic. Wait a minute, I am thinking too much again. There is a possibility anyway, but knowing him through email for few days, on the phone few days and a blind date, well, I should have known him well by now. That is what he said by the way. It is worth a phone call (Atleast I have a reason to do so). No! I shouldn’t call, it will look like I am too excited to go on this second date. So I text him;
Hi, how’s your day? Hope I am not interrupting. Just a quickie, are we going to somewhere fancy tonight?...lady D
Hmm, this text look like I want to go to somewhere fancy, I don’t have a dress for that, demm! I am going shopping tomorrow. I erased the text and rephrased my sentences;
Hi, how’s your day? Hope I am not interrupting. Just a quickie, we’re still on plan for tonight?...lady D
There you go, that sounds a bit relaxed. I need a coffee. And a shower. After about half an hour, I checked my phone, hoping he replied;
Hi Datin, I’m in this awful boring meeting, your SMS saved me from Zzz. I am really looking forward to see you tonight. What time shall I pick u up? Any suggestion for dinner? Ladies knows better …urs
Oh God! Oh God! What is “urs” suppose to mean?? Hmm relaxed. I need to sound relaxed and calmed. So that he won’t know I am already all above fairytales. Well, I am planning to wear casual tonight, I don’t want to look “too fast”, so;
Hi, that’s cute, why not we go somewhere near Bangsar? There have quite a good choices, see you at 8?...lady D
C U @ 8…urs
Well, I am half ready by 7pm. I am too excited. Too much. This is ridiculous. I am sitting on my bed, imagining his face. I know he is hot but suddenly I can’t remember how his nose look like! I know he is tall, but I can’t remember how he did his hair on the first date! What am I doing?
I am all ready 10 minutes before 8pm. Sitting in the room. He’s going to be late, I knew it. He’s a men and I am a women. Women knows everything. Wait a minute, this is not right. I am the one who suppose to be late. Eh, that is if we’re married and the fact that we’re totally not. So technically I am still following the rules of universe. My phone beeps;
Hi Datin, I am going to be a bit late, just woke up, probably reach ur place ard 9pm…urs
Great! I am all flushed, I sprayed my brand new perfume and I am looking my ultimate best right now and it will disappear by 9pm! What is he thinking? Sleep? What is up will all men, sleep during the day and also during the night? Forgive me lord, I just don’t get it. Now, what do I do for another hour;
Hi, are you ok? If not then maybe we can meet up some other time…Lady D
I want to see you tonight…I am hungry…urs
Surprisingly, a few of my friends drop by.
“Hey, you’re all dressed up, going somewhere?” that is Sophie, duh…obviously she knows I am going somewhere.
“You’re seeing someone already? How could you? You don’t even have a guts to tell us?”
“Jane! It is not like I am seeing someone, I am just going out with a friend. It all happen so fast and it is not like I need all of your approvals or something. I am planning to tell but it wasn’t tonight,”
“You made a ridiculous choice by having a relationship with Ezad on top of all the guys in the whole world, he’s short and ugly, he’s a pervert, I cannot understand it how did it last so long between you two. How can you stand that guy? Is that a good choice huh? well, that is a good point you need our approval bcos at the end of the day, you are the one who’s crying your eye ball out,” Ouch, Jane is defensive and mean sometime, but that girl loves me, she is one of my closest friend, in fact my bestest. Suddenly she reminds me how hurt I was, and she was the one I looked up to during those days. She hated Ezad so damn much.
“Ok now, leave her a space, so D, tell us who he is and where on earth you met this guy?”
That is
“I met him online, he sent me a resume,”
“WHAT??” said Jane, I can say the whole neighborhood could hear her.
“D, are you serious? Resume for what? I thought you’re doing finance, how come you’re hiring people?” Sophie is a bit concern, confuse most of the time but fascinate at the same time, she got her first boyfriend via MIRC.
That is so lame. Well, I didn’t do chatting, it just popped out.
“I wasn’t, he saw me on facebook. He dropped me an email. I replied and he sent me a resume to apply for a date. Something like that, and he got it,”
All of them looked dumbstruck.
“Well…..shut up cause I am not done. Ermm…I met him on a blind date by myself and he turn out to be a very good looking guy and he’s nice. He showed me his identity card and even his driving license. So, you guys don’t have to worry a bit,”
They were looking at each other. After awhile, Jane started to open her mouth;
“I am speechless, you do whatever you do but just leave me out of it,”
At this point I am not sure if it was me or Jane who just had a bad relationship. Jane is still single (she is not gay), she is the type who is very tough with the guys on the outside but inside she is actually a very shy girl. It is quite difficult for any of us to convince Jane to accept any guy in our life. I looked at my watch and it is 9.05pm. Where is he?
“Hi, where are you?”
“Hi D, I just left the house. My mom asked for my help to go and buy some groceries just now, I know I am late, are you mad?”
For god sake of course I am mad. Because you’re late I have to confront my friends;
“Oh really, its ok. I am just worried,” I am a hypocrite bitch.
“Great, usually girls would just scream and yell. I’ll drive as fast as I could to reach there,”
“Oh no, you better don’t. I need you to arrive safely,”
“Ok then, will call you once I reach,”
“Cool, bye,”
All of them pretending doing something, I know they were listening to my conversation.
“So, what bring you guys here?”
“We thought of asking you to go for dinner, of course we don’t know you’re going out with your new boyfriend,” Said Sophie while browsing through the magazine.
“He is not my new boyfriend Sophie, we just knew each other,”
There was a pause for awhile;
“Why not we go for a shopping tomorrow at Midvalley? What do you say?” I looked at everyone.
“I’ll drive…,” I added.
“Ok,” said Erin and the rest nodded.
Suddenly my phone beep;
I am already here, do you want me to come out or wait for you down here? …urs
I am coming down … D
Suddenly my nerves are all breaking and I felt nervous. My heart is beating so fast as I walk down from my apartment. Not again, I should be used to all this already.
I saw him and I smiled. I should scold him. But I guess not tonight, not now.
We decided to have dinner somewhere open space and cheap. That would be cool and cute. We managed to find a table and ordered our food. He looks so hunky, so cute at the same time with the cap that he’s wearing and a little bit of beard. He reminds me of Hugh Jackman, that is sexy alright. Oh great, dear lord save me. He has been staring at me for quite long now, so as me. He has beautiful brown eyes. This whole thing makes me feel itchy behind my ear. I need to start a conversation;
“Can I ask you something?”
“Yeah…shoot,” he laid back on his chair.
“Cute, tell me the truth, are you single?” I stared straight at his eyes and our eyes met. This is just to ensure he won’t lie, hopefully it works.
He smiled;
“I don’t know why, but you are one interesting girl. You amazed me. You know I am a stranger but you don’t seem to mind meeting me by yourself just after a few days knowing me online. But, you are insecure; you have been questioning me like you’re a detective and I am someone who is about to go to prison,” Don’t he dare change the topic with me.
“Well, maybe that is what it is, I am a detective, so answer the question please,”
He looks at me for a few second and he smile;
“No, I don’t have. I had once. She was my first love, we broke up a couple of months ago…my mom don’t like her anyway,” Ok, should I feel relieved?
“I am so sorry to hear that,” Actually I don’t feel sorry for him, I have done that been there too. But a girl needs to show her sympathy and concern. Some guy said they like sensitive girl. Again, I’m a hypocrite bitch! I know. I was in an acting class before, I must apply the knowledge somewhere don’t I?
“My turn now, can I ask you a question?”
Oh No! Don’t ask me that question. I am not ready to answer it, I would go crazy, chaotic and dramatic.
“Sure,”
I sip my drink. Trying to control my paranoia.
“Do you have a gene of a mix blood with the middle east?”
I almost choked. What kind of question is that??
“No, well…maybe, I don’t know. I guess if there is maybe on my dad’s site but way back then. Why ask?”
I can see he signed relieved;
“You have that kind of look, can see it from your eyes. My mom will like you, she’s so obsessed with the fact that our generations come from the middle east and hopes to continue it by her sons marrying someone who got the blood,”
Is he crazy?? Maybe his whole family is crazy. Who on earth bother about those things in this world anymore. What year are we living in? Did I take a ride on those timing machine. What am I talking about, he is talking about marriage! OMG I am a potential wife! Oh god! I wanted to scream.
“Oh…ermm, good to know. Anyway, if you don’t mind. Did you break up because your mom didn’t approve it?” I am a gossip girl, I need to know everything.
“No, it was so complicated. A lots of things happening, maybe we have been together too long. She had someone else,”
“Oo..hmm,” that sounds familiar. The food was awesome, I guess I was hungry. Then we started talking about school, friends and almost about everything. He is so good looking, he won’t fall for me. A guy like him can practically get any women he wants. Look at me! I am not hot, just simple and pretty (I am trying to make myself feel better here). I noticed some girls were once in awhile looking at us, some guys too. Wow! I feel so good, having a date like him driving those envious girls crazy and I look like trophy to those guys. I am embracing this moment. My spotlight.
“So, do you have a plan next Friday?” Suddenly he asked.
“I don’t know, I don’t plan so soon, what’s up?” while chewing my food. God! This is good.
“Maybe we should go out again, maybe just hang out a little bit often. I would like to get to know you better,”
He likes me. He must really like me. Then he added;
“I am sorry if I am moving too fast but…hmm,”
“I would like to get to know you better too, so that I won’t forget how you look like when I wake up tomorrow morning,” great, I am embarrassing myself. I am trying to get an excuse. Then I saw he smiled.
“You’re cute,”
Did you hear that? He said I am cute.
I am so lazy to wake up, I slept too well these few days. As I walked to the kitchen to make myself a coffee, I saw Sophie on the couch reading CLEO.
“What on earth are you doing here so damn early? What time are we supposed to go? Where is Maria?”
“She said she is visiting her parent, you know how Midvalley is. It will be damn pack if we go late, and I don’t want us to stuck in the jam then we’ll get back so late,” If I am a nice girl, Sophie is way better than me. She won’t stay out so late, but the only thing that will change her principle for a while is food. I can say not just her, Jane and Fiza are all the same, food freak.
“Ok, you better start calling
Sophie nodded and makes her way. All of my friends are staying nearby. Practically we are neighbors. I needed that, otherwise I would still be in bed suffering the heartbreaking. Suddenly, I remembered Ezad, the memory of him start to fresh back. I remember how I met him. I was in my first year in college. There was a tournament going on, it wasn’t the students. Some office held their game using our field. I was supposed to go and visit my parents and some of those guy’s motorbikes and cars are blocking mine. That is the day I got to know him. Everything happened so fast. I couldn’t believe it last for four years. I remember the day I said goodbye, I needed to let him go. We don’t belong to each other and it is not worth for me to fight for. I couldn’t trust him, my hearts keep breaking until I don’t have it anymore. On that day, I told him we needed to talk so he came and fetch me and we went out for lunch together, I was looking out the window the whole time he was driving. I looked at the sky and wishing that I have the courage to do this and stick with it and at the same time I hope I am doing the right thing;
“You know we can’t go on like this,” I started the conversation, he was quite all the way. Then he answered;
“We can’t if you’re parents hated me,”
“They have a good reason to do so, I am the only child. You hurt me Ezad! Not once, not twice but every opportunity you have. If a dad would ever let her daughter go, he will definitely wants her to be in a good hand, someone who would love her daughter more than he does, who would protect her from any harm and would never EVER do anything to hurt her. It is not their fault,”
“So it is mine?” He is defending himself.
“No, no it’s not. This is not meant to be. We are not meant to be. You chose her and it is clearly that we don’t have a future together,” I am trying to make it clear.
“Ok, so why do you want to see me for?” When he felt threaten he will definitely find a way to make me feel the same. Usually I will cry, I almost did, but not that day. I hold on to myself, I am crying in front of him. I need to show him that I am stronger and moving on.
“I appreciated all the time we have spent together, I wanted you to know I did love you and still do. But I can’t do this anymore,” He wasn’t looking at me, he was looking somewhere else pretending as if he wasn’t listening to what I am saying just to annoy me. I know he never listens, I don’t know if he did on that day but I need to let go. So I continue;
“I want us to move on, I know she loves you and I hope you’ll treat her better than me. I want us to be a different individual… I want to return all your stuff back and I want you to return mine,” Suddenly he looks straight at my eyes.
“For what??” He almost yelled.
“For me! I need to move on, I need to forget you. I need it for me!” I almost cried this time. Why does he always make it difficult for me.
“I don’t know where I keep all those stuff and I don’t want you to return mine. Just throw it away,”
“Ezad, c’mon. I know and you know that you still have mine. If you want to keep the rest, fine, but just give back my portrait photo,”
“I told you I don’t know where it is!”
“You know I love that picture, and we only have one copy, that will be the only thing that will remind me of you,” I was just saying it hopefully he’ll agree.
“I’ll give it back once I found it,” He sound a little bit pissed off but softens a bit because I was showing that I will still cry for him. He is the type who wants to have the authority towards a woman. It makes him feel like a man I guess.
Then he sent me home, before I got off the car, he pulled my hand and he kissed it then he kissed my forehead and his last words were;
“I am sorry for everything, you are one great lady and I hope somebody will notice that sooner than me,”
“Sorry is not the word Ezad, just so you know that God knows what he is doing and he loves me. Take care…goodbye,” I just closed the door and walked straight to the gate without looking back and my face filled with tears. It’s done.
Suddenly I am not in the mood to go out, but all my friends are all ready to go. So, we did. I bought myself a jacket and a pair of shoes. It cost me a fortune but I feel good. Like I said, it is a therapy. Then we go to one of the Restaurant for lunch. While eating, Sophie asked;
“What was the name of the guy you’re going out with again?”
“Omar,”
“Omar…hmm he sounds ermm nevermind,”
“The name kind of old school, but the name is nothing like the guy. I’m telling you guys, he is a good looking guy,”
“I don’t trust your taste, look at Ezad. Short and ugly,” Jane is being mean but all of us giggled.
“Jane, stop it, you shouldn’t be saying things like that,” I am being nice again.
“What…you know I am right don’t you?” Jane giving me the look,
“Well, I don’t have a choice at the time. But it is past, but this time, Omar is a good looking guy. Omar is tall, but Jane, almost all guys compared to you is short. But Omar to me is tall because I can wear my three inches heels and still he is taller. He is fair, dark hair and macho looking that reminds me of Hugh Jackman,” Jane is one of the tallest girls I ever known, actually they are two of them, another one is Lily. I have not seen any guy who is taller than them in this country, just some as equal.
“I don’t believe you!” Jane cried. “If he is tall you should have given him to me instead. You know how difficult it is nowadays to find a tall guy unless he is white,” she added.
“Too bad he came to me, but I think he is not your type of guy Jane. He doesn’t have straight teeth, I am not talking about a rabbit ok and he smokes…a lot,” I told her.
“Ok, that’s fair,” I should have killed Jane long time ago.
“D, tell us again how did the first date went,” Erin is the mysterious plus a little bit daring kind of girl, I will always turn out to her for advises. It is ridiculous sometimes but she is the type who will support me no matter what. I will be there for her too. I told them every minute of the first date with my Mr.Stranger.
No comments:
Post a Comment